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Wednesday, June 27, 2012

A Slinking, Sneaky Vegetable

At first we thought the plant sprouting in the flower garden must be a sunflower from a seed scattered by birds. Then it grew sideways, not up, and we thought, poor thing, it snapped untimely, but let it be and perhaps new stems will grow from the stump. It put on wide leaves, and we thought it might be a cucumber. Then it made its first blossom, amidst now enormous leaves, and we thought, aha, squash. Then it tendriled up from the ground and slunk across the deck, and we thought, well, it's a hybrid: it's producing nothing. Then we left for vacation.


Not a hybrid. The theory yesterday, a watermelon, given the longish ovoid shape, and we did spit watermelon seeds that direction last summer.

Yes, spit them. I am an honest girl.

The theory now that I examine it again: pumpkin. That stalk, that shape, those stripes. The boys did leave their Halloween pumpkins near until just after a proper burial was due.

It's teasing us with dozens of blooms and lurches nightly towards far side of the deck and the fence, in the neighbor's direction.

I've not planted such a thing on purpose before, and acquainted I may be with misc. mesclun greens, gherkins, tomatoes, collards, cotton, peanuts, carrots, potatoes, arugula, lettuces and radishes, yet this beast is making me nervous. Not like the other sudden plant next the side of the house, cherrily bearing cherry tomatoes and so obligingly set by a messy chipmunk.

What is he, please?

7 comments:

  1. Hahahaha...I loved your story and had to laugh out loud several times while reading it!
    I try a sherlockian examination on this (hope it's not too confusing, as I'm lacking some proper botanic terms in english...apologies about that!) It depends on the shape of the leaves and the texture of the peel...are the leaves jagged (pinked) and the peel is soft than it's a zucchini, are the leaves less jagged and the peel is hard than it's a pumpkin, probably a spaghetti pumpkin (at least that's how it is called over here - do you call it squash?!)...the current shape makes the latter more likely.

    Sabine

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  2. From what I can tell with the stem shape and lack of major fuzziness of the stem, I would say pumpkin. The flowers look right for a pumpkin to me also.

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  3. My guess is pumpkin...

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  4. The hive is sleuthing and Sherlocking, and I have gone as requested to check the pinking on the leaves, and the state of the vegetable's peel or shell, and guess what, the the leaves aren't so jagged and the shell is hard. All of you are saying "pumpkin".

    I reported the news to the boys, who were slightly disapointed. They were looking forward to dessert some week.

    Now they can look forward to pie and toasted seeds!

    Very best,

    Natalie

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  5. I do love random vege plants! DO share when you finally get to harvest the mystery fruit and chop it open! :)

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  6. Dear Mrs. C.,
    You bet I will! The plant grew another few inches last evening and we're directing it towards the edge of the deck.

    Very best,

    Natalie

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